Once again, I have allowed this space to gather dust.
So much has happened since I last posted—a solid six months, wow—that writing right now feels like I’m a stranger coming home. My phone memory, my camera’s memory card, and laptop memory are all bursting from the lack of space, which is technology’s way of saying I have way too many moments captured but not shared.
Without really thinking about it until now, half a year flew by just like that, all in the name of building a life we can call our own. It’s been a riot of long haul flights and dreams realized, a series of fights lost and battles won, a ping pong of meaningful conversations and useless drama, and calling it a draw at the end of it all and going back to one’s “why.”
In the six months that I stopped writing I:
- Got to see my art on display in a gallery for the first time!
- Entered my paintings into two major local art competitions, and it was worth the shot
- Went on a complete social media hiatus for two weeks to cut down on noise
- Joined a weekend art fair at SM Aura and introduced my art to total strangers
- Watched a toxic story unravel and learned my capacity for anger
- Traveled with my family to San Francisco, Alaska, and Atlanta, and it was the break I needed!
- Got to reconnect with my Tita Rose who we haven’t seen in years
- Went through the crazy process known as business development & construction for our first restaurant concept
- Permanently closed the doors of a brand I handled that I poured my heart into
- Uprooted with my family temporarily as we majorly renovated our home
- Lost a dear loved one too soon. We love you Tito Arvin.
- Successfully opened my first restaurant with Marco and our friends, Lan Kwai Speakeasy & Hong Kong Cuisine (!!!)
- Went on to manage said restaurant with as much grace as we could muster
- Stopped painting entirely due to lack of time & workspace
- Started co-managing four (4!) major brands at work with a new marketing team
- Went on a 24-hour work adventure in Hong Kong
- Failed to serve this year as praise ministry, but visited anyway during YE15 weekend and it was exactly what I needed
- Hustled like I never have before to promote Lan Kwai, and it paid off in ways we never even dreamed of
- Shot our first TV feature with Marco as an entrepreneurial couple, and it’s airing next month!
- Moved back home into a brand new room and a brand new everything
- Finally got to work in my new art studio at home, just last week
In four days I turn twenty-four, and all I want for my birthday is to really catch up with myself. I want to celebrate all that has already happened, and appreciate the present as well without rushing through another to-do list or getting stuck in endless traffic only to repeat the day again tomorrow. I have so much to be thankful for, but I also feel as if I have barely had the time to grieve what has been lost, all the days unaccounted that I did not get to whisper my thanks for.
Tonight, I spontaneously turned to writing perhaps to make sense of all the stories in me that have yet to become words. To pick up where I left off, and start afresh.
I found Heaven in pieces, in glimmer and dust.
With love and intensity,
Bea